The 60 Funny Love Quotes that will make you smile

Expressing your affection to the apple of your eye does not need to be too serious! Sprinkle a little humour to make it more memorable for him or her.
After all, humor makes you so much sexier and attractive to your partner! Here are quotes that are 100% spot-on romantic and funny:

Humans have 206 bones in their bodies. Spare the heart, break the bones instead!

I love you like how potbellied policemen are obsessed with donuts and how chubby kids love ice cream.

Grow old with me. Let’s count each other’s wrinkles as the years pass by. Let’s see who losses all of the teeth and who will need the help of the walking stick first.

It is important to see the real character of the person you will marry first before sealing the deal. How? Give him a slow internet service. They say that lag brings out the real you.

Being married has many wonderful perks. You have that one person to annoy for the rest of your life. Someone you can comfortably release your farts and burps it without shame. And most of all, you have someone who accepts you in spite of your smelly feet or your bad habits.

Remember this: If you send ‘I love you’ to someone, an emoji as a reply is never a good enough answer, no matter how colourful or big it is.

Love is telling someone that his zipper is open or her wig looks too fake.

60 Love Quotes

Honesty is an important part of a relationship. If you can somehow pretend to be so, then you are in.

Love is blind, and then marriage opens your eyes.

Make you sure you tell your partner how much you love him every day for you’ll never know when you’ll find somebody better.

For a woman, the first kiss is the start of everything. For a man though, the first kiss is the end of everything.

60 Cute Love Quotes for Her

To fall in love is to live in a world of both heaven and hell. There is no in-between.

Cold normal shower means alone. I prefer hot showers for two, it saves water!

60 Sweet and Unique Love Quotes for Him

Loving someone who does not love you means waiting for a shark to fly or a spider to have gills.

Like a few, love a few too but never trust anyone.

’I love you’ is a dangerous word. It takes less than a second to say, hours to explain and a lifetime to attest.

According to Newton’s Law of love, love can neither be created nor destroyed. However, it can create a girlfriend who can destroy wallets.

If love is a blunder, then it means that the biggest fault in my life is loving you.

Will you lend me a kiss? I promise to give it back.

My head and my heart will never cease their endless war. When my head says ‘I don’t care, my heart says ‘I do care’. When my head says ‘I’m not thinking about her, my heart says ‘of course you do.’

Quotes about letting go and moving forward

It is not love that makes a relationship complicated; it’s the people in it who do.

My mind works great wonder 365 days a year, 7 days a week and 24 hours a day…until I met you.

Don’t feel bad if you see your ex with someone else. Remember, our parents taught us to give the things we don’t need to the less fortunate.

I want to be the reason when you look down on your phone, you’ll have this goofy smile in your face and jump up and down like a silly little girl, and then fall down a manhole.

Loneliness Quotes

During my days, the teenagers talk about movies, music and love. Now, all the kids talk about are sex, relationship and heartbreak.

Love is like a headache or a backache. It does not show in the MRI or X-ray, but you just know that it’s there.

Staying in love for more than 5 years is almost impossible. Staying in love with the same person for you’re the rest of your life is a miracle.

Marriage does not only require you to deal with expenses and the toilet seat, you also have to deal with feelings and the last resort, the lawyers.

Promise yourself not to be a woman who needs a man to live, but a woman a man needs.

You will always be my 11:11 and the name I write in my naughty list.

The three vital things a woman needs are night creams, chocolates and compliments.

Girls cry their eyes out until they are dry, while boys drink their beers until their mugs are all dried up.

I wish there’s a traffic light to tell me when to stop, go and slow down when I took this road of falling in love.

I want to be your sweet good morning, your lovely good night and your most painful goodbye.

Stop waiting for your prince in a white horse. Go and find him. The poor bastard might be lost, stuck in an island or something.

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A woman can fake an orgasm to keep the relationship, while a man can bogus the entire relationship.

Love is great, but a divorce can cost greater than thousands of dollars.

Women needs a reason to have sex, while a man only needs a place to do the deed.

Marry someone of your own age. So when your beauty fades, so does his eyesight.

Heartbreak is one great way to lose a lot of your unwanted weight. You won’t eat for days, pour your energy on making your ex regret for leaving you and thus, spend your time on the gym.

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Marriage doubles your electric and grocery bills, the size of your tummy for 9 months and the energy you need to do the house cleaning.

If someone says you are lovely, cute or pretty, always remember that love is blind.

Not everyone falls in love at first sight. Sometimes, other looks at the amount written on the pay check.

The best way to find out what to get for your girl? Ask her to guess the gift you bought for her.

I can prove the existence of phantoms after I met you. I see you among the crowd, I see you in my dreams and I even see you in every photographs and posters that I pass by. Is this the madness you call love?

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Is it possible to calculate how fast you are falling? Apparently, by the time you’ve tried calculating, you’ve already fallen miserably on the bottom of an endless pit. And still, there will be no answer, my friend.

A sprinkle of jealousy is healthy. It’s good to know that someone is scared of losing you.

Sadly, love is part of growing up. It requires you to buy gifts for anniversaries, forgive over and over again, and most of all, deal with someone else’s farts and burps.

You know that you’ve been in a relationship long enough when it takes only 15 minutes for you to get ready and when you consider pizza and beer as your Saturday Date Night.

Marriages never have a guarantee. If you want 100% assurance, better go live with a car.

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You add meaning to my life and yet, you subtract some cash from my wallet.

You’re just like bacon, beer and chocolate – you make everything better.

Loss for words? Give that person a hug. It’s worth a thousand and more. Plus, it’s free!

You’re the cheese on top of my spaghetti, the cream on top of my frappuccino and the cheesecake on my red velvet cake.

I solemnly swear I am up to no good…especially when I am all alone with you.

You are the pain in my butt, the dent in my wallet and the scratches in my brand new car that I don’t mind.

Even if it means following you around and carrying your shopping bags, I don’t mind, as long as I’m with you.

I am known to follow my head wherever I go, but up until now it has lead me nowhere. Should I risk following my heart and brace myself for disaster?

My heart only skips a bit for two reasons: one, when I am facing a difficult enemy in a game and two, when you say my name.

Love is a type of forgetfulness where a girl only remembers one bastard forgets all the other boys around her.

Your dad calls you a princess and yet, you don’t need to act like a spoiled little brat around the man who loves you.

Hot and cute guys make your heart skip a beat, cool and charming guys make you go crazy, but funny and witty guys are the ones who will make you fall in love.

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This is as close as I can get to describing it – a hot pancake with butter melting on top and a steaming cup of coffee as soon as I open my eyes. That’s how wonderful it is to wake up knowing you are mine and I am yours.

You are the cause why my eyeglasses fog.

A person in love partly becomes a poet, a composer and the corniest person in the room.

I want someone who will pause his game just to answer my call.

You’ll know a person is in love when he can laugh like a fool by himself and keep a goofy smile plastered in his face all day long.

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If I give you a part of my pizza or my chocolate, then that means I like you so much.

I need to find a cure from the virus caused by your lips and your eyes that brings weakness on my knees.

If you want a perfect girlfriend, go find her in a Barbie store.

To a person in love, even a stormy and rainy day feels like a good sunny day, and the ugliest, the prettiest in his eyes.

All the voices in my head are replaced with your voice, the faces in every billboard yours and the songs on the radio all about you.

Look, I scratched my knees when I feel for you. The least you can do is to give it a kiss, please?

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